Following a Wife's Direction
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maṉaiyāḷai yañcu maṟumai yilāḷaṉ / viṉaiyāṇmai vīṟeyta liṉṟu.
In its ancient patriarchal and religious frame, the couplet says: a man who fears his wife lacks afterlife benefit, and even his mastery of action gains no celebrated distinction.
▸Other translations · Pope (1886) & Aiyar (1916)
“No glory crowns e'en manly actions wrought / By him who dreads his wife, nor gives the other world a thought.”
“Behold the salvation-less wretch that trembleth before his wife: his talents will never be held in any esteem.”
Parimelazhagar’s commentary
13th century · public domainParimelazhagar’s own words come first, unaltered. The plain reading follows below.
மனையாளை அஞ்சும் மறுமை இலாளன்= தன்மனையாளை அஞ்சி ஒழுகுகின்ற மறுமைப் பயன் இல்லாதானுக்கு; வினை ஆண்மை வீறு எய்தல் இன்று= வினையை ஆளுந்தன்மை உண்டாய வழியும், நல்லோராற் கொண்டாடப்படாது.
Source: Tamil Wikisource
Parimelazhagar describes a man who lives in fear of his wife as one without afterlife benefit. Even if he possesses the capacity to govern action, that capacity will not attain distinction celebrated by good people. This directly reflects an ancient hierarchy of husbands and a religious afterlife premise. In an equal modern relationship, consulting a partner is not incapacity; when threats or control obstruct action, the controlled person needs safety, rights, support, and choice rather than blame.