Examining Friendship
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kēṭṭiṉu muṇṭō ruṟuti kiḷaiñarai / nīṭṭi yaḷappatōr kōl.
Even adversity holds one benefit: it is a measuring rod that reveals the full measure of one’s associates.
▸Other translations · Pope (1886) & Aiyar (1916)
“Ruin itself one blessing lends: / 'Tis staff that measures out one's friends.”
“There is a virtue even in misfortune: for it is the rod wherewith to measure thy friends.”
Parimelazhagar’s commentary
13th century · public domainParimelazhagar’s own words come first, unaltered. The plain reading follows below.
கிளைஞரை நீட்டி அளப்பது ஓர் கோல்= ஒருவனுக்குக் கேடென்பது தன் நட்டாராகிய புலன்களை எஞ்சாமல் அளப்பதோர் கோல்; கேட்டினும் ஓர் உறுதி உண்டு= ஆகலின் அதன்கண்ணும் அவனாற் பெறப்படுவதோர் நல்லறிவு உண்டு.
Source: Tamil Wikisource
Parimelazhagar explains that a person’s adversity acts like a rod that measures all of that person’s associates without leaving any unmeasured. Thus even loss yields one benefit: it gives reliable knowledge of how those relationships stand. This does not advise manufacturing hardship to test people. In a humane modern reading, support may take different forms according to time, health, resources, safety, and responsibility; limited capacity alone does not prove false friendship.